Comes and Goes (In Waves) |
THE SENTIENT LIFE
________________________________ after midnight thoughts about suffering ________________________________
November 4, 2014
COMES & GOES (IN WAVES) by Greg Laswell
October 28, 2014
THAT I MAY NOT CAUSE PAIN by Kiros
These streets must have known,
I've been running from you.
I have placed high hopes in
Where gray skies begin
Where tears fall like the rain.
This is where my life is laid down
Please forgive me,
Please don't leave me, I know,
I'm so far from you.
Homeward bound let your grace resound
I am needing you.
Those whose hearts I hold close
Are those hurt the most,
By what's missing in me.
Trade-offs of open hearts
Found worthy of scars
May love show them all healed
This is where my life is laid down [x2]
Please forgive me,
Please don't leave me, I know,
I'm so far from you
Homeward bound, let your grace resound
I am needing you.
Rain, Rain, down [x4]
October 24, 2014
MEDICINE by Daughters
October 19, 2014
10 YEARS...LATER with The Format (Interventions & Lullabies)
Oh my god I gave my best but for three whole years to end like this
Well do you want to fall apart? I can't stop if you can't start
Do you want to fall apart? I could if you can try to fix what I've undone
Cause I hate what I've become
[Chorus]
You know me, oh you think you do you just don't seem to see
I've been waiting all this time to be, something I can't define
So let's cause a scene, clap our hands and stomp our feet or something,
yeah something I've just got to get myself over me
I could stand to do without, all the people I have left behind
What's the point of going around when it's a straight line baby, a straight, straight line
So let's make a list of who we need and it's not much if anything
Let's make a list of who we need and we'll throw it away
'Cause we don't need anyone, no we don't need anyone
[Chorus]
And I hate what I've become.
You know the night life is just not for me
'Cause all you really need are a few good friends
I don't want to go out and be on my own,
You know they started something I can't stand
You leave for the city,
Well count me out
'Cause all this time is wasted on everything I've done
[Chorus x2]
YeahOver meYeahOver me
[ FORMAT : the way in which something is arranged or set out ]
Ten years with Still's Disease.
I'm doing both better and worse than I thought I would.
I remember ten years ago wondering what it would be like now...not this, I can tell you that much.
It wasn't the smartest idea to lower prednisone during this anniversary. I was so focused on lowering during the summer, which is hell enough as it is, but my anniversary?! This anniversary?!
Worst. Idea. Ever.
On one hand, thank God I've lasted this long and fought this long and, yeah, kinda done this "well". On the other hand, which hurts like hell, this is "well"? Bummer...
Even though I knew I was about to lose all kinds of things like my dream job, an education, health, and independence, there was still soooooo much I had planned to do...I've done basically none of it. And that hurts the most.
I wish I had known how bad it would get. I wish I had know how little I'd have energy to do. I mean I have time. I have nothing but time. But what is time if you physically can't do a stupid thing with it or during it?! It's a curse. A curse that mocks you every day.
You wake up like healthy people. You get dressed like healthy people, kind of. You are a living, breathing thing like healthy people, again, kind of. You pass through time or time passes through you like every one else, and yet, you can't do anything with it. Not a stupid thing.
All these hours, to do nothing but think, and think and think and think....and plan all the things you may never get to do.
And the worse your life gets, the more everything hurts like hell--in a way it never did before.
[ INTERVENTION : action taken to improve a situation ]
[ LULLABY : a quiet, gentle song sung to send a child to sleep ]
I ALSO WANT
"I want the scissors to be sharp
and the table to be perfectly level
when you cut me out of my life
and paste me in that book you always carry."
July 31, 2014
WHITE FLAG BANDITS OF PEACE by John Sowers
John Sowers |
July 25, 2014
GOD & SATAN
July 6, 2014
GET DOWN by Audio Adrenaline
Lavishly our lives are wasted
Humbleness is left untasted
You can't live your life to please yourself, yeah
That's a tip from my mistakes
Exactly what it doesn't take
To win you've got to come in last place
To live your life you've got to lose it
And all the losers get a crown
[CHORUS:]
I get down and He lifts me up
I get down and He lifts me up
I get down and He lifts me up
I get down
All I need's another day
Where I can't seem to get away
From the many things that drag me down, yeah
I'm sure you've had a day like me
Where nothing seems to set you free
From the burdens you can't carry all alone
In your weakness He is stronger
In Your darkness He shines through
When you're crying He's your comfort
When your all alone, He's carrying you
[CHORUS]
This valley is so deep
I can barely see the sun
I cry out for mercy, Lord
You lift me up again
July 4, 2014
FIVE WORDS
FIVE WORDS
- HOW CAN I HELP YOU?
- I'M JUST LISTENING TO YOU.
- CAN I PRAY WITH YOU?
- I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU.
- I HAVE FAITH IN YOU.
- YOU ARE NOT A BURDEN