Kate: (Talking to Hanna on the phone) You know, training a horse is an art. You have to work with the animal. Bending its will until it knows your its master. Taking all the fight out of it until it truly is broken. That's how you're going to feel when I'm through with you.
- From Pretty Little Liars
Lately...lately I wonder how much fight the Devil has taken out of me. I don't even know where to begin. I don't even feel like me. I know what a story is. I know what it's made up of, its key elements. But I don't know how to write my story. I don't know what to fight for. I don't know what I want. I don't know how to hope. I don't know how to dream.
A story has to start with a character who wants something.
What do I want? I mean, really want. I have no idea.
Story. My life is a white blank page. I keep staring at it every single day, every single night. The starkness of it. The emptiness of it. My fingers are poised over the keyboard, and...and nothing. Nothing comes. That's all I have: A white blank page. It's torturing me. It's killing me. It's breaking me. How can I fight when there is nothing to fight for? I know what I am supposed to do, and I want to do it--I just can't. I can't think of anything to write. The irony is ridiculous. Writer's Block, but for my life. I can't write my life story. I'm stuck.
I feel...I feel all too much.
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